Friday, February 6, 2009

Jessica Simpson Breaking Down Due To Stress Of Whatever Her Job Is



Jessica Simpson, singer of popular songs such as....................................

Jessica Simpson, star of popular movies such as.....................................

Jessica Simpson, that woman who thought tuna was chicken on that reality show five years ago, broke down crying at a concert in Grand Rapids, Michigan (possibly because she realized she was in Grand Rapids, Michigan). This greatly disappointed her fans, who could only hear 38 minutes of interchangeable pop ballads. (And again, I'm not convinced any of these "Jessica Simpson songs" really exist.)

Oh, and now she's Famous for gaining weight, which is considered a felony in California. All of you pear-shaped US Weekly readers should look at the pictures and cackle, while stroking your cats named after the children you will never have.

I am only posting this so the people that google "Jessica Simpson" can find this Web site, listen to my rap songs, and have heart attacks.

Reuters
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1 Response to "Jessica Simpson Breaking Down Due To Stress Of Whatever Her Job Is"
  1. Jaime said...
    February 9, 2009 at 10:52 AM

    very funny..... my favorite part was "while stroking your cats named after the children you will never have." because that is exactly how i picture those people lol ... though cats rock

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